"I feel as though a
piece of me has died". These are the words my father-in-law used today to
describe how he felt about his older sister passing away, our Aunt Lola.
We understand how he felt.
They came from a very loving family of seven, five siblings and a mother and
father, all of whom died during the Holocaust. He thought that he had lost everyone
and by a stroke of luck found his sister after the war. Since then they shared
an extraordinary bond and her passing meant that he no longer had any of his family.
Sure, he still had his wife
of 64 years, two children, four grandchildren and one great grandchild. But
nothing can compare to the bond that one shares with a brother or sister or
parent. I have a brother and am certain that I would feel much the same way if
I ever lost him.
My father-in-law and Aunt
Lola were so much alike in so many ways. They are both kind, loving and
generous in every way possible. My beautiful wife has inherited many of those
same characteristics.
A big difference between the
two of them is that they were both raised in an Orthodox Jewish household and Aunt
Lola maintained many of those same practices when she came to the United States
and my father-in-law did not. That may be the biggest difference between the
two of them.
We often referred to Aunt
Lola as the "Zsa Zsa Gabor of Brooklyn". She wore a lot of jewelry
and many times when my wife complemented her on a particular ring, brooch or
bracelet, she just took it off and gave it to her, saying "if you like it,
then I want you to have it." And once she made up her mind to give you
something, there was no arguing.
You were going to have it.
Aunt Lola had a twinkle in
her eye and all three of her children seemed to have inherited that same trait,
a marvelous trait indeed.
We are scheduled to fly to
New York this coming Friday and had made plans to see her and the family on
Monday, knowing that this may be our last chance to see her. Aunt Lola is 91
years old and in poor health. I guess that our timing was just a little off and
that we will have to say goodbye to her in other ways.
Like my father-in-law, Lola
is a survivor of the Holocaust. Both of them have incredible stories to tell
and both of them have written books to tell them. Lola was personally
responsible for saving hundreds, perhaps thousands of lives during this time.
Her book is called "A World After
This" and is an incredible introduction to this amazing woman.
I often tell the story of the
funeral that my father had attended and afterward he approached the daughter of
the gentleman who had passed saying to her "I am sorry for your
loss". Her response was "I haven't lost anything. Everything I ever
got from him I still have, I just stopped gaining".
Certainly we can all feel
that way about our Aunt Lola. We have all stopped gaining.
You will be missed and will
live forever in the hearts and minds of those who knew you. You may be missed
most by your brother.
